It is better to guide than to set limits to the education of the youngest

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To be parents is to be witnesses, guardians and promoters of growth. bernardbodo – stock.adobe.com

guest columnist

| You have to give clear YES and NO signs, as if it were a marked route: dangerous bend, slowdown, authorized right turn, end of shoulder. First of all, let’s take our story and not repeat it because each generation goes a long way and, fortunately, we have opportunity to improve . If you’ve been yelled at or hit, step aside and change the impulse to a reflection.

Cries for words. As for penances, I think they are not necessary, simply because they are not useful

. If a child breaks glass with a ball and I forbid him to eat dulce de leche for a week, this child does not learn anything about how not to break glass again. I also read:

Crises and limits. How to raise with love without losing patience

How to set limits for children with respect and empathy

  • The questions arise first: Who should be limited? Who do we have in front of us? Who are we dealing with?
  • With a child who naturally needs to move, run, jump, physically download, every day. This is how he learns to take ownership of his body, know his abilities and train his skills.

And also in a child who naturally needs to observe, touch, inspect everything around him, each object becomes a source of curiosity. This is how he learns about the world around him and how it works. So, now we can answer whoever we have in front of us:

an athlete and an explorer.

Do we want to limit it or do we want to guide it? I prefer the verb guide

at the limit of the verb.

  • How do we guide it? Preparing the ground for it to take place athletic display
  • (squares, clubs, patios, any spacious place will be our greatest ally) and its scientific deployment, removing all valuables from circulation and leaving only objects that satisfy the curiosity of our explorer (colored pencils, markers, papers, plastic bottles, etc).
Give clear YES and NO signs, as if it were a marked route: dangerous turn, slow down, allowed to turn right, end of shoulder.
To be parents is to be witnesses, guardians and promoters of growth. (AP Photo/Chris O’Meara)

To be parents is to be witnesses, guardians and promoters of growth. (AP Photo/Chris O’Meara)

The same energy is invested in indicating the paths of NO as in indicating the paths of YES. For example, we may go out into the street anxiously shouting NO, NO, NO!!! Don’t run, it’s dangerous. In other words, point out what can’t be done. Or we can go out into the street saying “run on the sidewalk to the sidewalk and you have to stop there because the street is full of cars. i.e. pointing

what can be done. If we only propose a NO path, the child will believe that the world enjoys the same level of danger , without nuances or contrasts. If we only recommend a YES course, we will deprive the child of the progressive and gradual learning

on the real dangers.

When we can transmit this message, it is incredible, almost magical to immediately see the success of the result, since the child appreciates the clarity of the proposal, appreciates appreciating the yes and respecting the no. He begins to make the difference between allowed and forbidden, he calms down because he knows that an adult will guide him in this space he is going to cross, telling him precisely what he can do and what he cannot To do. We will always be careful that our predominant message is: I let you do what you are

. The child calms down automatically because he feels that his athlete and his explorer are cared for and guided.

Source: TN

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